The Best Advice Your Mother Never Gave You, she was unable to give because she did not know it. We do not know, what we do not know, so we do what we know. We learn about relationships from our mothers, fathers, teachers, coaches and society. These beliefs and behaviors that we learn influence our relationships. Are these beliefs helping or hindering your relationships? One question to ask yourself is: Are my relationships working the way I need or desire?
When we were growing up our mothers taught us many important things as far as navigating the world we live in. However, most of our mothers never taught us about having emotionally healthy relationships, because they were never taught about relationships, nor were their mothers or their mothers’ mothers. These intergenerational behaviors in a sense can be called the legacy that has been subconsciously handed down to us. As a psychotherapist with over 25 years of experience and 100,000 clients, I understand how our limiting beliefs affect our relationships. Our belief systems are triggered by others’ behaviors, and then we over-react emotionally, withdraw or sometimes even freeze, numb out. Our partners also have their limiting beliefs – when both of us are emotionally triggered conflict, blame and shame can ignite.
My new book The Best Advice Your Mother Never Gave You: A Guide To Finding Love in the 21st Century guides individuals to become aware of their limiting beliefs and coping styles through self-assessment tools and provides effective tools and principles to revitalize relationships, decrease divorce rate and/or help you figure out why you are attracting the wrong kind of partner into your life.
Cathy Lumsden, psychotherapist, researcher and international speaker has counselled adults, families, teenagers and children. She has been an Associate with the Adlerian Counselling and Consulting Group since 1993.
Prior to opening her practice in psychology, Cathy worked at the Ottawa-Carleton School Board and the Royal Ottawa Hospital. Cathy was the Director of Training at the Mind/Body Connection in Philadelphia for several years where she also presented internationally. During her three years in Philadelphia she hosted a Parenting Show on the local TV network.
In her corporate training programs, Cathy focuses on improving employee engagement and satisfaction, which increases productivity and decreases staff attrition rates. In her counselling, Cathy provides effective tools, skills, information and encouragement to help her clients find solutions to real-life problems. Cathy has extensive experience working with anxiety, depression and stress.
Recently, Cathy has launched two new-guided mediation CDs based on brainwave therapy –‘Deep Relaxation’ and ‘Tapping Into Your Inner Wisdom’. She has blended the science of the brain with the psychology of the mind and body, creating products with immediate and long-term benefits. These audios are part of her program called BRAINSENSE. Brainsense is an educational program that promotes knowledge and awareness of how our brain impacts our lives. With this “Brainsense” you will easily learn that you have more control over your mind, your body and your health than you realize. Cathy Lumsden 613-737-5553, email@example.com